Lifestyle Pick (Hygge)

Hello Hygge! Farewell Fakeness

Are you genuinely happy from inside? Or just faking your smile for those ‘Instagrammable’ selfies and the surrounding society! You only know better if you are hiding your sorrows, difficulties and sore wounds. Discover the secrets of pure happiness with hygge that teaches you the art of well-being by seeking joys in humble funs and amusements of life!

By PRAMITA BOSE

Hey It’s Hygge!

The philosophy represents your happy bubble — a space where you find your calm and emotional contentment. In other words, you are under a hygge effect — pronounced as hoo-gah.

Primarily a Danish concept, sociologists suggest that this positive attitude of hygge has been quite instrumental in frequently catapulting the Scandinavian countries and broader Nordic nations (including Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Finland, Iceland, among others) to the top slots of the happiness index. This is proven by the World Happiness Report that publishes the annual ranks on the happiness scale.

Reckoning this repeated feat, a benchmark seems to have been set to follow in the leading lands’ footsteps. That is why it becomes so important to spot magic in mundaneness and pen poetry, no matter how prosaic the mosaic of life looks and how drab its routine gets. A sunny smile works wonders across miles, laughter can be your mood booster and happiness is your pep-up medicine.

Derived from an Old Norse (the North Germanic language spoken in Scandinavia and its settlements in early Middle Ages) word meaning ‘well-being’ or ‘protected from the foreign realms’, hygge creates a secure, congenial atmosphere. It motivates one to drink life to the lees or live it to the fullest every moment like there’s no tomorrow.

Sad Nucleus

It’s true that this age sermonises ‘the survival of the fittest’ axiom, inform motivational speakers. Those who conform to this criterion will predictably last in the long haul. Coping with financial pressures, staying always relevant, meeting targets and deadlines, branching out passions and interests, and withstanding the deluge of social media prompts and overloading headlines, people easily get burnt out.

“At the same time, traditional support-systems are collapsing into nuclear clusters. Evidently, people are becoming more isolated, grappling with FOMO syndrome and getting detached from the core of reality checks. We are now a restless lot and that is telling on our happiness scores,” warns author, CXO coach and TedX speaker Parinita Kothari.

Your Pick: Economic Prosperity or Peace?

Although statistics reveal that India lodges a solid GDP figure and is emerging as an economic superpower, AI giant, information superhighway but that doesn’t get replicated in its social fabric as well as on the mental health map. Why is it so?

India today is a pool of opportunities. Its growth is visible, cyber connectivity is impressive and a seamless access to almost every kind of convenience and comfort has improved over the years, acknowledge market watchers. “But do economic prospects of a nation directly translate to its common good or mass happiness? Not really, I presume,” doubts Kothari.

Success is increasingly defined by what you have, not how you feel. Thus, undue comparisons, dissatisfaction, frustration and squabbles start pouring in every now and then, observe sociologists. “We are living in a fast-paced world but our ability to process emotions is not in tandem with that speed rate. We are overwhelmed and awestruck by the fusillade of constant changes around us,” notes Kothari.

Behavioural experts preach that we need to be anchored by a sensitive mind, the right kind of attitude, an unflinching intent to remain grounded and heart-winning sentiments to even melt the hardest stones. “That said, there has been a palpable shift in the paradigm. More people are turning towards wellness awareness and self-love. I earnestly believe that this will gradually help bridge the gap between our external success and inner fulfillment,” claims Kothari.

Simplicity: A Tough Lesson

Is it too difficult to stay modest and happy in a demanding consumerist culture, under relentless peer pressure and in the vortex of acute, cutthroat competition as well as being always stuck in a rat race thrust upon our shoulders?

Modern life does take a toll, many would confess. From backbreaking timelines to strained relationships, people keep running from pillar to post to fix issues in day-to-day living.

There should be clarity of thought, a heightened focus, robust value system and a steadfast family backing to manage the macrocosmic chaos so that it doesn’t trickle into one’s abode, advise psychological counsellors.

“Paying attention to both mental and physical wealth is paramount. As the saying goes, charity begins at home — the seeds of good education, ethics, community service, soft skills, sense of responsibility and leadership acumen should be instilled right in schools, within families and later at workplaces to build characters with a stern moral compass and courage. This is because if you sow well, you’ll reap well,” opines Kothari.

One must learn to cut through the clutter, weed out the unwanted thorns and determine the paths of ease and purpose in life, even within a tough and taxing world, she views. “This is therapeutic. The bottomline is, take the bull by the horns. Never let it overpower and consume you,” she instructs.

Bliss or Bank Balance?

It is often probed whether success, name, fame and moolah can be equated with the happiness of mind?

“Yes and no, because both can contribute to happiness but cannot promise its permanency. Accomplishments and money bring in comfort and security but beyond a point, stop adding to a happy frame meaningfully. I’ve even seen affluent and thriving individuals navigating a void inside or getting rattled, despite having everything on paper. Their inner world is rocked and rendered hollow. On the flip side, people with fewer resources often feel deeply content as they have transparency, better balance and attainable objectives in life,” expands Kothari.

A cushy ambience, warm exchanges, an optimistic vibe are indispensable to one’s happiness. Human wisdom defines it as a state of mind. But can agreeable sights and sounds guarantee total gratification? Well, that depends and differs individually. But what’s the harm in embarking on a search with a torch light and a magnifying lens — steering the dark mazy lanes, sharp bends and the treacherous curves of life?

In the Lap of Nature

Shut out the world of pollution and go off grid. Dive deep into clean environment and tap into its renewable energies, start slow living, mingle with the local customs and cultures while travelling, do forest bathing, sky gazing and meditation, plus connect with the spiritual you.

Moudgal admits that slow travel is a rage now. “People have understood that it is not mandatory to have an itinerary during their tours, unless it is for business-leisure purpose. Thus, people have started to slow down and actually soak in the landscape, folklore, trade, skills, art and crafts, and food of the locations they travel to. Exploring one site completely is better than visiting a couple of destinations in a hurry,” he perceives.

“I recently did a solo bike ride covering 1,600 km from Bengaluru to Panchgani and returned to the starting point. Albeit my trip was filled with many pleasant events, I particularly bumped into a perky bright kid near a highway dhaba. That made my day. He was curious about my setup comprising the vehicle, equipment and baggage, and wanted to see me without my helmet. When I took it off, he smiled at me and said that I look like a hero. Further, he conveyed his wish to trot the globe on two wheels like me. It felt good inside to be able to inspire another generation to pursue biking,” he recalls excitedly.

He further ascertains that travel enlightens him to look at the smallest bit of things on earth from a different angle and value the invaluable things. “It also gives me a chance to know my country well, zipping across terrains, various states, towns and cities. It’s the freedom on my bike that lends me an intense bout of euphoria. The engine roaring, the wind blasting, the zigzagging rural roads and the winding, murmuring rivers always bring a wide smile to my face,” he rattles off.

Reality Versus Reels

Our personalities and ideologies are distinctive, say behavioural analysts. So are our socio-economic-religious backgrounds. “Our actions and reactions might not match in the same context. Likewise, our passions and ambitions won’t display any parity. We set different goals to reach different destinations. We think, ideate and act in our own ways that may or may not be similar to others. Our perspectives are subjective. Every child is exclusive, every adult is exceptional and to a life-saving doctor, each human counts,” insists S Giriprasad, an acclaimed psychologist at Aster Whitefield Hospital.

“We must have a safety net and have specific boundaries set for ourselves. Lives designed and tailor-made for luxury, rehearsed emotions, pancaked makeup and put-on expressions are a far cry from the ground realities and hard facts,” debates Giriprasad.

Happiness originating from much-hyped fads, viral content (videos and posts), a utopian world seen through the rose-tinted glasses and promoted via public domains like the networking sites becomes transient because it creates a deep fissure between fact and fancy. People feel inadequate about their latent talent and abilities and ultimately, fall prey to low self-esteem when things get compared to a conjured la la land.

“You look for a sounding board to link your feigned exhilaration to popular tastes and approvals, and try meeting some far-fetched standards and patterns. There’s no iota of authenticity in this drama scripted out of milking TRP-wooing trends. People experience temporary relief when they stalk impossible fantasies but those cannot ring true. They are just a hoopla,” exposes the psychologist.

Happiness is Incomparable

Different countries have different global, geopolitical and domestic tensions to deal with. Does definition and scale of happiness vary from nation to nation? Rebuilding lives from devastation, reweaving dreams from the debris and celebrating festivals in rubble are like a routine ritual for the denizens of war-ravaged nations.

For them, the bare necessaries of life — food, clothing and shelter — become equivalent to unaffordable comforts with starved stomachs, tired limbs, empty pockets, sleepless eyes and danger looming overhead every minute. Normalcy is like a distant dream. Resilience is expectedly practised everyday.

“Basic human emotions are universal but their expressions might vary with different experiences and dissimilar socio-economic plus cultural standpoints. People from different zones across the global terra firma have distinct ways of understanding happiness,” concedes Giriprasad.

“Areas affected by geopolitical conflicts or economic instability need urgent access to essential resources and secure conditions for daily survival, whereas in well-heeled societies, people have plethora of options to choose from to be in high spirits and in fine fettle. Some societies teach their members to achieve happiness for personal indulgence while others prod them to work towards a common aim: mass welfare and social harmony. Thus, happiness exists as a dynamic concept, which evolves in sync with multiple social structures as well as cultural values of diverse communities,” he concludes.

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